Sleep solves everything. Well, that’s what they say. Some people can’t sleep because they have insomnia, I can’t sleep because of two major reasons; the crazy pains I occasionally experience at night forces me to take the mighty morphine, which, in return, takes away my sleep. Oh, and the other reason, I can’t sleep because I have internet.
I have been staying with my other beautiful family for the past two months, and this’ what I have realized; people who say they sleep like a baby usually don’t have one. Because if you had a baby, you’d know those little humans don’t sleep peacefully, or as the case of Little master Tre here; they don’t sleep at all. If your friend wakes up your sleeping baby, they aren’t really your friend.
I and my bed are perfect for each other, but my pain meds keep trying to break us up. Sleeping is my drug, my bed is my dealer, and my painkiller is the police. When people see you lying down, with your eyes closed and they still ask, “Are you sleeping?” Tell them its some sort of prayer. I think sleeping was my problem in school. If school had started at 2 pm in the afternoon, I’d be a professor running for president somewhere. I have lived my entire life risking my job, career and future to get extra fifteen minutes of sleep. And it is always worth it.
My sleeping pattern isn’t even a pattern anymore, it’s a freestyle. I start it in the morning and I don’t think there is any sunrise beautiful enough to make me wanna see it when I get up. Plus, what are birds excited of at 5 in the morning?? However, I’m glad a lot of things have changed since I began my chemotherapy in April. I used to be so much afraid of the night because, to me, the night was when all my demons came alive. Night time brought all its vultures ready to devour me and every time darkness approached, my mind reminded me of what awaits. It was crazy.
But, I’m still afraid of the night because I cant sleep enough. Pain occasionally creeps out of its hiding place to make my nights the longest. At some point before I began the treatment, I felt like I was always stuck in one season of the year because of the same events repeating themselves in my night life. Mornings are the best part of my day as I rejoice surviving these little battles. Those who call me in the morning know this lil secret.
Anyways, fam, don’t give up on your dreams, keep sleeping. The future is shaped by your dreams, so stop wasting time and go to sleep! You know sleep is like a time machine to breakfast. The only other activity that is remotely enjoyable asides from sleeping is eating. You’re a genius if you can do both simultaneously. Sleep until you’re hungry, eat until you’re sleepy. I’m forced to suspend active participation in the two till I’m done with my cancer treatment.
Taking power naps is not a mark of laziness. You are not lazy… You could be on power saving mode.
Blessings. Till next time.
Blessed are the Restless for they will always find adventures (Vincent Mboya, 2022).